Here are we, somewhere I never wanted !!

For me taking decisions is all that matters, and I m failing to do so.Everybody heard about hibernation and returning healthy, thats what attracts me. These days I m feeling as I'm stuck in time. every day is an hour and spending it , feels like an year.
My speculation about my own character is very ill, i think I'm totally living in a Never-land.
I have not achieved any laurels but my instinct acts as in I'm a starry celebrity. Absolute intoxication of thoughts and non realization and non acceptance of reality. My gloomy life style and loony ways are so crazy , that no prizes to guess that i get doomed. This board is the only place who is not criticizing me.
Somewhere I myself don't trust Loveleen,he is a fluke, does everything as only expecting, not working hard. Man reality is hard and such a cowardice act is here as in living under the shades of parents protection o save himself from any humiliation and extinct.
Finding a place to fit in is very hard!!. At least for loveleen, a man with wrong attitude.
I dont know how long I m gonna survive like this , totally loathed with guilt.